Failure

There is this fear i have. it is a fear of failure, i can't seem to shake it. i've had it all my life. It makes me think that maybe if i hadn't been told all the negative things about me when i was younger then maybe it's because for the same reason. I've had this fear of failure that reaccures in my life over and over again. let's see, when i was a kid i took up cheerleading, and then i quit because i thought that i looked stupid kicking my feet up and down yelling and stuff but i was totally ok with the whole dance routine thing. ok so after that i took piano. i felt like i was good enough to just go to my lesson and never play outside of there because i didn't need all of that. I also did cheerleading in sixth and seventh grade, but i was a punk and i was shy around all the preppy white girls who were rich and thought that i was below them because i was neither white nor rich. i then started to be on the dance team when i was in eighth grade and i was really good but once agian i was shy and i got into trouble and my mom told me i couldn't do it and though i cried i was sorta relieved that i didn't have to find a reason on my own to back out of it. Over the course of Highschool i attempted to run track, freshman year i attended the whole conditioning session and the half of the season but then i ended up quiting (for reasons i can't understand) from then on (sophomore year) i was just out of shape and too shy and i had a job (at least that was my other excuse) so there i am, irma the girl who has a fear of failure. I can't let this go on. I can't let this allow me to ruin the rest of my highschool career or make me stop working or make me some how flunk out of college.

SITTIN AND THINKING AND DREAMIN...i'm so cool