Time After

There are emotions that your body doesn't forget. These are such as love, anger, lust, pain...your body keeps these in a small little box in the back of your mind. Something like storage. When you experience something you haven't in a long time, you body lets that emotion out and 'reminds' you how it felt the last time. Your mind remembers, your heart remembers, your body remembers. Some of these aren't emotions at all...they are times. Times you were abused, times you were hugged, times you were pushed. Your body remembers these too, doesn't let them go. So that the next time you feel this it will 'remind' you. Your mind remembers, your heart remembers...your memory remembers. These might also be the things that you forget. You don't remember the last time you were hugged but you know how good it felt. How angelic it made you feel. You don't remember the last time you were abused but you remember how hurt you felt. How useless it made you feel. Time After you forget you will always remember....always. The light in me sees the light in you.

Things That Move Fast

Things that move fast; cars, planes, life, time, love, heartbeats, school...taking into thought the things that go fast in our lives. Today's topid will be time. Just last week i was looking at Hawk Week posters and the first two weeks of school and just yesterday i was thinking about finals week and the fact that i'm almost done iwth my first semester of college. My friend Camy told me the other day that i wold go by really fast...and he's a junior. I'd have to say that i agree. Sitting in class waiting for the clock to turn to 11:50 so that i can leave, go eat and maybe spend the rest of my day alone, in my room, watching T.V. or even alone, in the dining hall, eating. I will sit around all day, possibly doing homework at one point or reading books downloaded from Kindle Amazon. Then i would move on to shower, all of this stretching on a days worth of time and yet...it is filled with emptyness...about two weeks from now i won't even care. I will be at home, where time will fly, for an entire month because not only am I so broke that i can't even afford to borrow for Christmas I'm too poor to take the bus ($1.50) to go to my sisters house. I will sit in the house, edit my book, write the ending, and hang with the family. I'd possibly even try to hang with those friends who didn't really like me in the end (as usual) just as not to be stuck in the house doing nothing but playing the WII and watch my niece Molly grow up. And then i would suddenly be spirited back into school, moving all of my stuff BACK into my dorm room in McCollum (unfortunately known as the party-dorm). I will start class and call up that woman that has been nice enough to give me a job (even though i actually got fired from Hyvee the last time i worked there). Time will fly as i learned from my mistakes so my grades get better and my heart goes emptier at the absence of the one person that would make my life a lot happier. I would miss him a lot and we would try to talk to eachother as much as possible, staying in touch to the best of our abilities. Then the next thing i know, I will be spiraling through finals and enrolling in classes for sophomore year. Including that studio class that i had to wait an entire school year to get into (That pushed my college experience from 5 years to 6.) I will be signing that lease for that great apartment that I will find and planning that summer job that will give me means to Mom and Dad's birthday presents bought early. Seeing as it didn't take me that long to go through a few months of life...it should really show how time flies, time slows down, time can be measured but not in things untangible...overall, I guess what i'm trying to say that, regardless of anything anyone has to say, time moves too fast. The light in me sees the light in you.

A Night To Forget

The craziest thing about being bored is being avble to do something about being bored. most people would say that you should give children or young people something to do when they are bored so that they dont go and do crazy stuff but actually. if they can find somehting to do on their own...that might not be such a good thing to do either. my friend and i had a helluva night. you could say it envolved shots, drunk driving (and parrallel parking), a 21 and older bar and a bathroom floor. it also envolved sleeping in a car, running out of gas, being stranded so far but yet so close to the doors, and waking up with 'car hair'. It was a night that i'm not too sure i want to remember. this should be one of those things that when i'm older i can tell my girlfriends who've been through similar nights AND LAUGH. From my perspective it broke Sara and i together. you can very rarely say that you did the things that we did and not have had fun the night in converse. I just never ever want it to happen again...like EVER. and if it did...i would want someone to be there that could take care of us and make sure that we dont crash and burn like we did so elegantly that night. ok enough about my miscrepancies......(if that's even a word lol) The light in me sees the light in you.

National Novel Writing Month- Done

I must admitt that over the years i have always gotten out of things somehow. maybe it was because i was bad and getting in trouble so my mom kicked me out of it. or that i didn't get the right grades, or that i quit because i was scared. but this...this month was a struggle well struggled. I procrastinated so hard that i cause myself major harm. I'm sure the characters in my story would shivv me in the guts if they could because i didn't write for almost an entire week and a half. I was forced, there at the end, to spend a few days doing nothing but writing (which of course, affected the rest of my life.) I love NaNoWriMo! it is crazy but at the same time the constant writing, the wordwars, the coffee...it all just gives me tingles just htinking about it. I am so excited to be done, especially since i'm going to be trying to get it published after it's edited fully through. I'm telling ya, i've been writing all my life but if i hada been doing this all my life? i would be a waaaayyyy better author than i am now. Thanks J-WOC for all the help! and encouragement- and thanks to everyone else that inspired me or motivated me to write over the last month...much love! I'VE CHANGED...AND THATS OK...I'M A BETTER PERSON...WHERE IT COUNTS!